Sometimes Mommy Wants To Feel Pretty

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Do you ever just have one of those days where you just don’t feel pretty anymore? If so I am right there with you! Some days I just feel homely and nothing like my former self (childless…single) used to be. Now I am in no way saying that I don’t think that I’m pretty or fishing for compliments. Some days I just don’t feel like myself. I feel like I am everything for everyone else and nothing to myself. I am a wife, sahm, chef, chauffeur, maid, accountant, personal shopper, referee, therapist and the list goes on & on.

Being a sahm means that most days I don’t really have to “get dressed”, ie: wear something that isn’t yoga pants and a sweatshirt, like I used to when I was working full-time. Honestly some days I really do just stay in my pajamas all day long. If it wasn’t for the fact that I think my oldest’s bus driver would look at me like I was scummy I would probably stay in my PJs more often. But even “dressed” a bit I still don’t really feel like my old self. Yes I know that people change a bit due to their lives changing. I just didn’t realize how much I would miss the old me some days.

I’m not even talking about my early twenties. I’m talking about even a few years into marriage before the kids came along. The days that I would get up, put makeup on, really get dressed and leave the house to do adult things. What things? I have no freaking clue anymore, but I’m sure I did adult things like walk around Barnes & Noble aimlessly. Those days where I didn’t have to rush what I was doing because I wanted to make sure that I got home before my kids had a meltdown. The days where I thought those mothers who said that shopping at Target alone was like a vacation were joking!

So the other day I decided to actually get dressed, do my hair and put makeup on. My youngest was napping and I figured what the hell, it’s better than cleaning the house! My husband gets home later and looks at me and asks “Did you go somewhere today”? I said no, that I haven’t left the house. He then asks “Well why do you have makeup on then’? And I said “Because I wanted to feel pretty for a change”. Que to my husband looking that me like I was crazy and rolling his eyes as he walked away. I don’t think that he realizes that I saw the eye roll, but I did. And honestly his reaction hurt. Why is it so ridiculous that I want to feel good about myself some days?

It’s not like I plan to do all of this very often, because quite frankly I don’t have the patience. (Winged eye liner can be a b*tch to do!) But I would have really appreciated something better than him acting like I was stupid because I wanted to feel like a normal human being again. Is it really too much to ask for to just say “you look great babe” or even a freaking “good for you”. Why is it so crazy that I want to feel like Stefanie again and not just Mommy? Coincidentally I went to my parents house that day and even they looked at me a little weird, but at least they were smart and ignored the fact that I had really tried that day.

But after I got over their reactions, I realized that I don’t really care what anyone thought about it. It made me feel good about myself. I liked looking in the mirror and seeing myself, not just wife/mother. I got to look at my reflection and see the woman that I really am and not the slightly frazzled mama who depends of caffeine to survive the day. I got to be just Stefanie and it felt damn good!

 

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Comments

  1. Ellie says:

    amen to the winged eyeliner! It’s a nightmare to get it even on both sides lol! I loved your honesty in this post and i’m glad that at the end you felt able to say “heck with it – i feel happy with me!” ๐Ÿ™‚

    Ellie
    http://www.maplesyrupandteacups.blogspot.com

    1. StefFlynn says:

      Thanks! It really is important to do what makes you feel good. Being a mom means that alot of the time we over look overselves while taking care of the nuggets.

  2. I don’t have kids yet but do hope to stay at home once I do. It is good to remember to do this for ourselves sometimes!

    1. StefFlynn says:

      Once you have kids everything changes! Most in a great way but some times you get so focused on everyone else that you forget that you have to take care of you too! Hopefully you remember that when you do have kids!

  3. Feeling pretty makes me a much nicer mom and wife, so it’s a priority for me ๐Ÿ™‚ Agreed!

  4. I am all about moms remembering that they are people, too. Do you, girl!

  5. Kemi says:

    I know the feeling.. I used to be super fashionable it seemed as soon as I had my son all of that went out the window. But it has been coming back gradually and I am so happy for that!!

    1. StefFlynn says:

      It get really tough b/c you feel like you aren’t being the best mom if you do something for yourself, or at least that’s how I feel somedays.

  6. AmiableEmapth says:

    Love this!!! That winged eyeliner is a struggle and then some!!!

    1. StefFlynn says:

      It really is! And forget hoping that both sides come out the same!

  7. Vaishnavi says:

    Oh yes. This is so true! As an SAHM, we don’t care to dress to impress others. And it makes absolute sense to impress ourselves! Self-image is the key to our success ๐Ÿ™‚

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